I wrote this first draft for a poetry workshop that same day. And the initial responses I got were:

Brothers relationships were unclear–how many, blood-related or adopted, etc.
images/phrases of dualness acted as a thread through the whole piece.

Too disjointed? One thing does not lead to another. Does it have to?

Perhaps this is a companion piece to another poem about the relationship, written from a different perspective? To offer as a balance? (I agreed with this)